I share this fact in almost every keynote and masterclass I lead because I have always loved building with bricks and it is my favourite form of meditation. I am often asked why I share these types of facts about myself.
I spent a big portion of my career building technical solutions that were reliable, innovative, and efficient. What I learned over all those years was that no matter how technically sound a solution was, it is the personal connections we make that actually make a project successful.
Sharing my height in bricks is an intentional way to share a piece of myself so others can remember me. It is the first brick in building a connection (pun intended). Building these relationships is a continuous process of adding layers, not just a one and done event. You might not know what the structure will look like when you add that first brick. You could be building a tower, a bridge, a flower, or a cloud. At that stage, you just know you are building a solid foundation.
Last year, I read Rosalind Chow’s book, The Doors You Can Open. In her book, she argues that while a mentor works to change a person’s behavior, a sponsor works to change how the rest of the world sees that person. As she puts it, the person being sponsored "receives opportunities that made it so that everyone could see them more clearly."
This clarity doesn't happen by accident; it is the result of the connections we choose to build. It begins the moment we decide to move past a brief chat and actually invest time in getting to know the person behind the title or the role. When we do that work, we are clearing away the noise so that their talent and character can eventually be brought into focus for everyone else to see.
The lightbulb moment for me is seeing connection as a spectrum. It starts with that first brick—a brief, memorable chat where you share something personal. If there is a spark, you add another brick by connecting over coffee. At this stage, you are simply collaborating, sharing perspectives, and seeing how your bricks might fit together.
For many, this is where the relationship thrives: as peers who look out for one another and offer mutual support. These connections are the bedrock of our daily work. But sometimes, a relationship evolves further because one person needs specific guidance or the other has a unique perspective to offer.
When that happens, the connection can shift into mentorship. This is a more intentional way to share advice and perspectives. It requires frequent touch points to keep the foundation from wobbling and it is where you really get to know the strength of the relationship.
The final layer is sponsorship. This is where the connection becomes strong enough to support a risk. As Chow says, this is where you share your reputation.
You are no longer just giving advice behind closed doors; you are putting your own name on the line to help someone else be seen more clearly by the rest of the world.
It is a natural progression of trust and you cannot build a tall, complex structure without first ensuring the bricks at the bottom are snapped firmly into place.
We can improve our leadership by recognizing where we are on the spectrum of connection with the people around us. We can identify which brick needs to be placed next:
If you have only had a brief chat, ask for a coffee.
If you are already collaborating as peers, find a way to offer a specific resource, a helpful introduction or a piece of encouragement.
If you have a strong foundation of trust, mention their great work in a meeting where they aren't present.
Don't worry about what the final structure is going to look like. Just focus on the next brick. These small acts are what build a solid foundation. Whether a connection stays as a supportive peer relationship or eventually evolves into sponsorship, it's the strength of those early bricks that makes the difference. Real growth is a sequence of moments that create a solid foundation for everyone.
The most impactful leaders are the ones who focus on the connection first. When we take the time to build a solid foundation brick by brick, we create a structure where everyone can be seen more clearly.
What is the next brick you are adding to a connection today?
I look forward to hearing your thoughts in the comments.
Here’s to finding your spark—and letting it shine.
Karen